Ask Rachel

Interesting fact: If you drive without your license on you, the worst that could happen is the police don’t believe you are who you say you are, and you get carted off to jail until they can ID you. No biggie. Unless you’re not who you say you are.

Interesting fact: There is no cure for the cold because 160 different strains of rhinovirus cause colds. No word on when or why we started swapping snot with rhinoceroses.

Interesting fact: Oil is a slang term for beer in Mississippi. I’m a much bigger consumer of essential oils than I ever realized.

Interesting fact: Milquetoast comes from the main character from the daily cartoon “The Timid Soul,” which started in 1925. Tell me, was 1925 technically part of the twenties?

Interesting fact: I just did some insta-research, and many peach trees are self-pollinating. So my new favorite insult is to make like a peach tree and go eff yourself.

Interesting fact: A 6-foot balled-and-burlapped Christmas tree can weigh 250 pounds. Try bringing that down the chimney.

Interesting fact: “Eating crow” likely comes from our belief, extending at least to the Middle Ages, that eating carrion eaters is as repulsive as using a public restroom.

Interesting fact: The German dub of “Die Hard” gave the German terrorists English names. No one wants to think they’re the bad guy, huh?

Interesting fact: The early version of farolitos were actually little bonfires with 3-foot stacks of criss-crossed pin?on branches. Makes a live candle in a paper sack sound pretty fire-savvy, doesn’t it?

Interesting fact: Harrison Ford reportedly never signed a contract for the original three Star Wars movies. I won’t ask him to sign anything either, if he can promise me six good years (or even six good hours).

Interesting fact: It’s garlic – not onions – that ward off vampires. This magical protection likely has its roots (get it?) in historical times, when you can’t prove to me that vampires didn’t exist.

Interesting fact: Cranberry sauce wasn’t sold until 1912, and not on the mass market until the ’40s. More proof Thanksgiving is a sham!

Interesting fact: Halloween has its roots in an ancient holiday whose origins remain shrouded in cobwebs and mist. The hollow weenie jokes, however, originated as late as the 20th century.

Interesting fact: Hermit crabs often have symbiotic relationships with such creatures as anemones. However, this week’s hermits don’t seem to need such companionship.

Interesting fact: The original patent for the toilet paper roll indeed shows it unspooling from the top, you monsters.

Interesting fact: For all the differences in ingredients and styles and methods, the true distinguishing factor between muffins and cupcakes is frosting. Diehards out there swear a cupcake always has frosting. So what does that make a naked cupcake, hmm?

Interesting fact: I googled Interesting Facts about football telephones, and I learned instead (through that People Also Ask feature) that people also ask, “Were there phones in the ’80s?” and now I pretty much want to quit everything.

Interesting fact: Beyonce? is a contemporary pop culture reference for me, but her first solo album, “Dangerously in Love,” came out when Greta Thunberg (she who is now changing the world) was merely 5 months old.