Ask Rachel

Walk this way, flush test and Mr. Clean
Walk this way, flush test and Mr. Clean
04/13/2023

Interesting fact: Even the CDC recommends walking on the left side of the road, suggesting that those righties are some kind of disease.

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Time capsule treasure map & pickleball, again
Time capsule treasure map & pickleball, again
04/06/2023

Interesting fact: Nearly one in six Americans are playing pickleball. So in Durango, it’s got to be like 5 out of 6, with the other person recovering from knee surgery.

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Not so sweet dill & deep thoughts
Not so sweet dill & deep thoughts
03/30/2023

Interesting fact: The greatest snow depth ever recorded in the USA was 451 inches in Tamarack, Calif. I’m sure they got more cumulative snowfall, but the cold undoubtedly made it shrink like a sour gherkin.

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International days of drinking and sock it to me
International days of drinking and sock it to me
03/23/2023
Interesting fact: If you think about the Easter bunny being a goddess of fertility and rebirth, and eggs being symbols of fertility, and spring itself being all about fertility… man, Easter could be a very different kind of holiday.
 
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Top scooper, republi-cant's & work-life imbalance
Top scooper, republi-cant's & work-life imbalance
03/16/2023

Interesting fact: The first known drag balls were held in Harlem in the 1920s. I know for a fact that Tennessee lawmakers don’t know this historical fact, or else they’d have preemptively outlawed drag in, like, the 1870s

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Tough crowd, a hard sell & animal oddities
Tough crowd, a hard sell & animal oddities
03/09/2023

Interesting fact: Knitted socks originate in about the 1200s. One must presume, therefore, that the first unbearable sock puppet performances were foisted on parents in about the 1200s as well

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Forever tax season & one home too many
Forever tax season & one home too many
03/02/2023

Interesting fact: Lawn bowling is not, in fact, the same as bocce ball. This is evidenced in the way that one sport involves cursing the uneven grass in the public park, and the other involves doing so but with a different style of underhand toss.

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Two thumbs down and not-so feng shui
Two thumbs down and not-so feng shui
02/23/2023

Interesting fact: The slang word “keister” comes from somewhat uncertain etymology, yet absolutely certain humor quality. So how come I hear nobody but me use it?

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Game of love, getting wood and rub down
Game of love, getting wood and rub down
02/16/2023

Interesting fact: The first Super Bowl was on January 15, which math tells me is more than four weeks before Valentine’s Day. I can’t wait for the first time those two behemoths coincide.

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The best way to screw, nouveau lingo and 'dese nuts
The best way to screw, nouveau lingo and 'dese nuts
02/09/2023

Interesting fact: Why does the term “co-ed” refer to women specifically? I mean, besides the term co-educational coinciding with women co-taking classes with male cohorts. Co-ed really, to be coherent, should concern all students.

 

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Weighing costs, smoker's section & snowed in
Weighing costs, smoker's section & snowed in
02/02/2023

Interesting fact: The first time smoking was curtailed in Congress was 1871, when a dozen eggs cost 30 cents.

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Glove love, seeing red and dark arts
Glove love, seeing red and dark arts
01/26/2023

Interesting fact: International law dictates that all go signals must be green, but due to some linguistic stubbornness, you get traffic lights in Japan that are the bluest possible shade of green.

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Earning your stripes, turf wars and a rice gesture
Earning your stripes, turf wars and a rice gesture
01/19/2023

Interesting fact: The inventor of road striping was following a leaky milk truck down the road when the idea came to him: why not store milk in jugs instead of trucks?

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Sweat it out, Xmas year-round & fake it till you make it
Sweat it out, Xmas year-round & fake it till you make it
01/12/2023

Interesting fact: Electric Christmas lights were a status symbol for many years after being invented. So keeping strands up year-round will impress the heck out of any time travelers from the past.

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Barking at ghosts, mommy issues and playing with dolls
Barking at ghosts, mommy issues and playing with dolls
01/05/2023
Interesting fact: That string of random &#^$*@ characters we use for swearing in print is called a “grawlix” and should be spoken as “bleep.” Or “bleeping,” as context requires.
 
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Battling the bulge, berry deep thoughts & whisky is for fighting
Battling the bulge, berry deep thoughts & whisky is for fighting
12/22/2022

Interesting fact: Humans share about 60% of our genes with bananas. Also, about 60% with fruit flies. Ergo, fruit flies are made of actual fruit.

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Fan mail, cutting corners & grinchin' out
Fan mail, cutting corners & grinchin' out
12/15/2022

Interesting fact: There are airtight (or spacetight) zippers that the astronauts use. I sure hope NASA pays more than $35 for flight suits. 

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Big Brother face-off, dis'ad'vantage and reindeer games
Big Brother face-off, dis'ad'vantage and reindeer games
12/08/2022

Interesting fact: Not only are AI illustrations a thing, but we now have AI “culinary research assistants,” which I trust less than a skinny chef.

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Getting dogged, Christmess & celebrity recall
Getting dogged, Christmess & celebrity recall
12/01/2022

Interesting fact: Stuffed toys for dogs can simulate either babies to be carried around or prey to be torn apart. I’m a little concerned those roles have so much overlap.

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Cran-troversy, going solo and pickle perplexed
Cran-troversy, going solo and pickle perplexed
11/23/2022

Interesting fact: Americans consume 5 million gallons of jellied cranberry sauce every holiday season, and 73% of them prefer it jellied in the shape of a can. Cran cran, in the shape of cans, cans!

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