This Week's Sign of the Downfall

Mock Blocked

Sixteen red states enacted laws last year requiring porn sites to verify users’ ages, but doing so violates user privacy rights, according to Pornhub and its parent company, Aylo. So, on Jan. 1, the South awoke to sweeping blocks on every legal porn site, but you get what you vote for, amiright? Now southerners must upload photocopies of government-issued identification before viewing adult content, which means we’ll finally be able to prove that Ted Cruz is into BDSM the next time he logs in. And really, this is a blessing in disguise, because without porn, the south will not rise again.