Interesting fact: Red letter days are so called because, dating back to Roman times, calendars often indicate important dates in red ink. Or else the red ink warned of impending Roman periods. Either way.
I can always count on you to set some crazy people straight, even if you don’t exactly answer their questions all the time. But you’ve been extra bitchy lately. Are you having a streak of red-letter days on your private calendar? Trouble at home? Lady issues? Someone kick your dog? Total PMS? Whatever bee has gotten in your bonnet lately, you can probably guess where my money is. Just hope you’re OK.
- Aunt Flo
Dear Red Rum,
You caught me. I’m on a weekly period that coincides with my advice column deadline. That’s right: PERIOD. Does that word make you uncomfortable? Is MENSTRUAL CYCLE more acceptable because it starts with men? We don’t need euphemisms for the biological phenomenon that makes our very existence possible. We need someone to figure out a way to continue our species without some of us having to bleed into our pants for several days every month.
– A red river runs through it, Rachel
I’m a well-educated human being with a deep mindfulness practice and honest-to-god training in time management. Yet I have started clicking on those “suggested links” in my Facebook feed. The ones with titles like “Her Boss Refused to Give Her Bathroom Breaks to Snort Blow. She Got Her Revenge.” Clicking on these leads to more getting suggested, and now I am powerless. How can I cut this ever-more-addictive cord?
- Can’t Won’t Don’t Stop
Dear Target Audience,
That’s right. You are the target audience. Facebook has got us nailed. They know us better than we know ourselves. I mean, I started getting ads for male ED wipes in my feed. I did not even know I was a market consideration for ED wipes. So maybe you can stop fighting it and just embrace the full list of who you truly are.
– You won’t BELIEVE number five, Rachel
What is your analysis of the Durango tipping practices? Your local road warrior, known as your Uber driver, receives a tip from the rider about 50 percent of the time. Your local server, who listens to your dinner order, refills a water glass and slaps down a plate of pasta is customarily awarded 15, 18 or 20 percent of the total bill. Sure, they need tips since their pay rate is so low, but your driver, wheeling along at 65 MPH to get you to your flight on time has your life, not your linguini, in their hands. Can you explain?
– On the Road Again
The worst is when you tip employees at an establishment, and only after you’ve dropped the cash in the jar do you see the sign that says all tips are property of the employer and not the employees. You can’t give the cash to the workers or they risk getting fired. You can’t take your money back from the jar without, technically, stealing. You can’t, but I do. I just shout at anyone who judges me that “I AM HAVING A RED LETTER DAY” and they pretty much leave me alone.
– Gratuity included, Rachel