Civic lids, robot road trips and heavy lifting

Dear Rachel,

So, when do all our local politicians start sporting bright, bold DGO caps? I want to see them at every solemn event, from ribbon cuttings at new breweries right up to ribbon cuttings at new pot shops. This is clearly the new standard in civic respect, and any city council member wearing anything less clearly doesn’t love Durango like the rest of us do. Maybe they should start selling these caps in the visitor center so the rest of us can join in too. DGO! DGO!

– Cap’n America

Dear Ball Cap’n,

There are so many things to consider here, especially when you think about how any politician, from City Council member right on up to the mayor, has to cultivate their image. Do you want your leaders to be tasteful or garish? Muted and well-considered, or loud and … well, loud? I think this idea only works if the ball cap is clearly mass produced, with no considerations for fit or fashion – or any considerations whatsoever.

– Put a lid on it, Rachel

Dear Rachel,

We don’t need self-driving cars in cities and towns. We really should have them, though, for long highway travel. I drive a lot for work, and yet driving is not my work. Every six or eight hours I’m on the road is time I could be spending doing better work, if only the car could do the driving for me. What do you say, Rachel? Should we get long-haul self-driving cars?

– Otto Pilot

Dear Freewheelin’,

Personally, I don’t want to be on the road with robots who are likely to sit right at 64 in a 65 with no legal passing lanes for miles. But I’m not you. I get carsick if I do anything but stare out the window. So I might as well pay attention to the road. But it’s true, not every task needs a human. This advice column? 100% human. The Herald’s Rachel column? Probably also 100% human, though I have no proof.

– Busy busy, Rachel

Dear Rachel,

My brother-in-law just helped me move. I couldn’t have done it without his help. Couches don’t lift themselves. But now all he’s done for two weeks is complain about how sore he is and how many books I own. I treated him right, gave him beer, bought all his meals and paid for his gas. Am I missing something?

– Relo-Kate

Dear Rehomed,

Beer, food, gas, eternal gratitude? You got it covered. Plus, he should have known the deal when he signed up to be a brother-in-law. There’s really only one more thing you could have done for him, if you didn’t. And I know this is big to presume, because maybe it should be a given. But … did you ever stop to think about giving him a DGO ball cap for his troubles?

– Moving right along, Rachel