Ironic parties, inconvenienced and living outside the box

Dear Rachel,

Everyone is griping about the Great Gatsby party being tone deaf to the plights of millions of Americans. And rightly so. What good is such horrible irony if we can’t continue to skewer it? Are there other literary-themed parties we should hold, strictly to illustrate how out of touch those in power are? (Even more than people in power normally are.)

– Nom de Plume

Dear Name of Feather,

Oh, how about literally any politically guided novel written in the last 500 years? Very rarely are the good artists aligned with the powerful, particularly the powerful-and-willing-to-starve-people. Perhaps even better than a themed party would be a reading group or a volunteer group. Not another party. Unless it’s an art party where we all get drunk and paint gourds. I could be a party to that.

– Party on, Rachel

Dear Rachel,

We patronized a business the other day with a notice that “FOR YOUR CONVENIENCE we only accept credit cards; no cash, thank you!” Who are they to decide what is convenient for us? What if we get paid in cash tips and don’t have good enough credit for a card? What if it’s convenient for us to deal in bills because we’re evading taxes? Convenience is paying however we like. We’re mad that they’re trying to spin their own preferences as our own.

- N. Debt & N. Convenienced

Dear N. Sensed,

The best book title the world has ever known might be “In God We Trust, All Others Pay Cash.” Cash was king! But we decided we’re done with kings. Instead, we now like fees. You think we’re not all paying for those credit card percentages, even when we pay with cash? I think we should return to a cash-only ecosystem. Coin only! Just once, I’d like to drop a sack of change on a counter. But to, like, buy a car.

– Under the table, Rachel 

Dear Rachel,

I haven’t figured out the allure of a good cardboard box, but it’s undeniable. Even better? The joy of finding the perfect use for a long-kept box. I just stuck a shoebox in a nightstand, hoping to contain my various bedside salves and balms, and it fit like a dream. That justified every box I’ve ever kept. But my partner thinks I’m hoarding and taking up space. You want to have my back on this?

– The Boxer

Dear Boxed In,

It all depends on how much you anticipate moving in the next six to 12 months. If you have a moving day on the horizon, hoard away! If not, and if you are not in a shipping-centered profession, and you don’t have cats, then you really should limit yourself to whatever adorable boxes you can fit inside a single larger box. Or, host a Boxcar Children-themed party and share your wealth.

– Boxed out, Rachel