Pie holes, moment of silence and clean breaks

Dear Rachel,

I did a good job avoiding politics at Thanksgiving dinner. But we came to fisticuffs over the pie. Not how to cut it or who gets to eat it, but what to call it. So tell me: is it PEE-can pie (as in, a can you pee in, ew), or peh-CAHN, rhymes with James Caan, celebrated film actor? 

– Your Nutty Buddy

Dear Persnickety,

For once, I have an actual factual answer here. (Thanks, NPR podcasts on Thanksgiving road trips!) Pecan is linguistically derived from the Algonquian family of languages, which have various pronunciations but lean definitely toward “peh-CAHN.” Where the pee can came from is beyond me, but a pee can is nearly as useful as NPR podcasts on a long road trip.

– Nucking futs, Rachel 

Dear Rachel,

I think a moment of silence is due on Dec. 7 for the veterans and civilians who died on that day, the start of WW11. I hope you have a short note for all of them. Thank you.

– All Veterans

Dear Historian,

I had a genuine moment of thinking “World War 11? Are we already there?” And then I had to pause because it seemed all too plausible. And then World War Two didn’t click for a bit because it started well before the U.S. got involved. But yeah. Let’s have not just a moment of silence for the people who died at Pearl Harbor. Let’s have a longer moment to reflect on how we might prevent ourselves from being the bad guys in the third big war.

– Seldom silent, Rachel

Dear Rachel,

After a breakup, I make a clean break. I realize this isn’t for everyone. But there are some things that are sacred. Like, my family. Except my ex from more than a year ago just reached out to my dad, a novice backpacker. Turns out she’s planning a CDT trek next year and wants his help with training. Except he is not a trainer, nor an expert, nor even a dedicated hobbyist. WTF is happening? She’s super crossing the line, right? How do I undo my clean break to tell her to back off?

- X-Games

Dear Not Quite X-tricated,

I want so very badly to agree with you that this is uncouth, clingy, manipulative behavior. Which it probably is! But there could be some extenuating circumstances. Like, were your ex and your dad independently friends outside of your relationship? Is he more handsome, distinguished or richer than you? Could you have caused some valid need for some personal revenge? Do you call the nuts PEE-cans? If any of the above are true, then perhaps you’re due for some self-reflection (and a very awkward Thanksgiving next year).

– Cleanly broken, Rachel